Saturday, January 17, 2009

We've only just begun...

Saturday morning workouts are the toughest training day of the week. It starts at 6am with a pool swim. Usually 2100m, but there is little rest in between sets. And most people wear wetsuits (I don't), so it's a struggle to keep up with the people that I can normally cruise with. Then it's on to 75 minutes of spin class with the craziest spin instructor ever. Here are a few gems from recent classes:

"Come on you big sissies, get your head out of your crotch and PUSH. Suck in that fat gut too, because you're all disgusting me."

"No one likes a sissy! What? You're okay with getting that award for 'special honors'? They'll tell you that everyone is a winner, but guest what? IT'S NOT TRUE! Now CLIIIIIIIIIMBBBBB!!!!"

"Look at those thighs jiggling. You've all let yourselves go. Pathetic. Pathetic, ALL OF YOU. Now push. Push. PUSH. I....SAID....PUUUUUUSH. PUSHPUSHPUSHPUSHPUSH!!!!!!"

"Get what you came here for. Give a little now, get a lot back later. What's your flavor? That's right, KOOLAID! Everyone Is Drinking It RIGHT NOW!"

"No one likes a sissy. And if you are one, keep it to yourself for God's sake, don't tell anybody. If you're a sissy, just quit, get out of my class. Everyone else, STAND UP AND CLIMB! SUCK IN YOUR BIG....FAT....DISGUSTING...GUUUUUUUUTS!"

The classes have been getting progressively harder over the last few weeks. The pools of sweat under the bikes are starting to meld together and form rivers. Today was brutal. I would like to blame it on some minor nagging injuries, or cumulative fatigue from starting training again. But the truth -- I'm just out of shape and yeah, I've let myself go a bit lately, and really, his class is kicking my ass. KungFu style.

Today we did some climbing, some speed work, and then in the middle of class he told us to get off our bikes. Huh? Oh yeah, grab your bike, get on your tippy toes, squat. Good. Now hold that position for 3 minutes. Holy mother of the devil! Within a minute I was shaking pretty good. Shortly after that I started crying. And then thankfully it was time to get back on the bikes and sprint. About 10 minutes later we had to do it again. I was crying in about 30 seconds this time. I mean full on sobbing, tears dripping on the sweaty floor, snot stringing down my face kind of crying. Then we got to do 40 squats. Those weren't as bad though. And then 3 minutes of holding our elbows at shoulder height, pulling our arms back and then to the front clapping our hands.

It was a fantastic workout. But I'll be recovering from it all day. And probably tomorrow, but I have an 8 mile run to knock out. And during all this, I can't help but have this on repeat as the soundtrack in my mind - "we've only just begun...."